Yearning for God's reign, especially in our discomfort
That anger might make people feel uncomfortable, but listen to it. Use your emotions as fuel to work as hard as you can. That emotional energy indicates love for your church and your calling. It will sustain you.
I was a solo pastor, still in my 20s and serving a rural congregation, when I attended a continuing education event at a seminary. A lecturer led us through a typical case study about a couple of older women who were blocking the ideas of the younger members in the church. I was in the midst of similar struggles in my own congregation, so I became passionate during the discussion: “I get so frustrated! They hired me to bring younger people into the church, and now that young people are there, they want to drive them out!” In the process, I realized that I was undermining the point of the lecture—which was to make sure that the established members received proper care.
During the break, I walked up to the lecturer so that I could apologize for contradicting him. Not that I felt terribly bad, but a professor/friend told me that I could be “scary” as a student. So, I wanted to assure him that I was friendly and on his side. I joined him in the coffee line and as soon as we had filled our mugs, I offered him my hand and my warmest smile. “Hi. I’m Carol. Sorry I got fired up in there. I really appreciate the discussion. It just struck a chord, you know?”
He looked at me, with his brow wrinkled into a scold, “You. You have deep anger issues. You need to do some serious work and get some professional help for your issues before you will ever be a good pastor!” He didn’t bother to take my offered hand.
