Is God bald?

I heard from a relative today a story about a younger child in our
family who asked her parent if God has hair. The parent had at least
enough theological sophistication to recognize that it is inappropriate
to say “yes” in response to such a question, and so answered “No.”

The child looked puzzled, and said “So God is bald, then?”

It occurred to me that this story illustrates the simplistic
character of many discussions about God. If God is not literally like
certain childish or anthropomorphic depictions, then that simply leads
to the conclusion that God is literally like the opposite of those depictions, or simply literally does not exist at all, disappearing completely along with his receding hairline.