The mall food court tables are close together. You can't help but overhear the two teens at the next table. She says gently but firmly, "Thanks, but I don't think so, I'm just not interested in you that way." His face melts. You're sure he's watched quietly from afar and has been dreaming of this moment for months. The poor girl is sympathetic: "Jeff, I think you're a really neat guy, but . . ." He interrupts, desperate, and to your horror begins to argue: "Jennifer, if only you got to know me I think maybe you would like me that way. I'm really fun to . . ." It's unbearable. You quietly gather your bags and walk away.
Sometimes a good argument can clear away barriers that keep love from blooming. But argue someone into love? That's a painful category mistake. It's just not how love works.